The Name of the Rose
What do you do with the scraps of soap that are left after the bar is no longer sufficiently robust to clean effectively? I found myself this morning with elongated wafers of three Yardley soaps: Oatmeal & Almond, Cucumber & Aloe and English Lavender, each of which I had used until they were translucent discs. The English Lavender, which has so potent a scent that when I wash my face with it at night, I can smell my own face, was itself only employed as a last resort; and I was left with no other recourse but to, by the sheer force of my bare hands, combine these three scraps into a single soapy mass-- the most powerful bar of soap imaginable!
Later I noticed a promo for Monday's NBC Nightly News that Brian Williams will have an exclusive! interview with former President Gerald Ford. It made me wonder: is there a generation for whom the Presidency of Gerald Ford was a defining moment? I mean, without hitching his wagon of destiny to Nixon? If you were born in the 80's or late 70's, the Clinton Presidency is probably most ascendent in your consciousness. Or perhaps if you were born in the 60's or early 70's the Reagan years define your generation. But what about Gerald Ford? Does he slip through the generational cracks? I wonder whether it was wierd to have a guy named Gerald as President. Don't they yank the line of succession out from under you with an equivocal name like that?
"Oh sorry, Gerald. That's a good name for a V.P. but it just won't do for Commander in Chief. We're swearing in Spiro in the morning."
But then, what's in a Presidential name, really? We've had a Rutherford, a Woodrow, a Chester and a Grover. Where did Grover Cleveland come from anyway? Was he the Muppet Governor of Ohio?
Debate Moderator:"Tell us Gov. Cleveland, why you think you are qualified to be President of the United States."
Muppet Governor: (R-OH): "What makes me qualified for the highest office in the land is that I am both cute and furry." (raucous applause)
Moderator: "Senator Byrd, do you have a rebuttal?"
Which reminds me, if you happen to see Terminator 3 this weekend or at anytime in the near future, turn to the person next to you, aquaintance or stranger, and say, "This guy wants to be Governor of California?"
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