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Blacklisted

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I was fumbling around for some nuggets (mmm... nuggets) on the uppcoming nfl draft, when i found this lovely bit of musing:

Socialists of the world, GO TO HELL
At the Senior Bowl, there were rumblings about the future of NFL Europe. Some indicated that NFL Europe might not play at all this year... The unsettling situation in the Socialist Second World, Europe, specifically Germany and France and their sucking up to terrorists, would put "our" players in jeopardy. The anti-US sentiment is more than players and coaches should put up with.

First, let me say that we are very fortunate in this country to have avoided the kind of politics that Europe has been subject to. Otherwise we might not have our HMO's or our high infant mortality rates and low wages, relative to the rest of the industrialized world. Who should we thank for this? There should be a holiday.
Second, the President's speech writers should be immediately lobbied to declare France and Germany evil, as only they have the metaphysical authority to do. And Mexico should be put on some sort of watch list. After all, you're either with us or against us, dead or alive, amen.
At least we can count on the support of Bulgaria.

On Charlie Rose last night, Youssef Ibrahim said, "Yasser Arafat is locked in two rooms with a cell phone... and all he can do with the cell phone is order a sandwich." Is there really a good sandwich place in Ramallah that delivers? Maybe they have a Jimmy Johns, or a Quizno's that only delivers for the one hour a day the city is not under curfew.

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Bohemian Rhapsody

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Occaisionally, i will listen to music to help me fall asleep. One night recently to this end, i put on Puccini's La Boheme which i have borrowed from the library. I was using a portable cd player that is new and still not fully familiar to me. I fumbled around the buttons to blindly adjust the volume as i listened to the first act. As i began to doze off, it seemed like this one song was going on forever. I wasn't following the story then, so i don't know what the song was about, but it seemed like a sad song; a little tragic. Not second act of Madame Butterfly tragic, just melancholy. As it turned out, i had accidentally hit the repeat button and had been listening to the same track for at least twenty minutes.
I remember as a freshman in college having a brief exchange with a music major about opera. (Not that i really knew anything about it then, or now.) I argued that a "sad" aria was more compelling than a "happy" one. He disagreed.
I suppose i just tend to prefer tragedy over comedy, and i like comedy to be, at least, sublime. I scoff at those who prefer Shakespeare's comedies to his tragedies. A Shakesperian comedy can be funny, but where are the important themes of the human experience? They seem to me to lack substance. I have difficulty appreciating literature, music, etc. that does not aspire to larger ideas. When i first heard the Jay-Z song "Girls, Girls, Girls" i thought it was intended to be ironic. It seemed to me, he was talking about a rather sad and lonely condition that he did not know how to escape from. Certainly, i must have been inclined to think this because it conformed to my own worldview. But over time i came to realize that it was not irony at all, but braggadocio and i, disappointed, decided never to countenance his music again. I realize that this is still an uniformed judgement, but for now i accept its convenience.

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Time Bandits

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I have, on many occaissions, passed by one of the Garrett's Popcorn Shops in the Loop and seen the winding cue that crowds the store and wondered whether any popcorn could be worth such a time consuming ordeal. But, it turns out, if the consumption of time is your aim, then it is less an ordeal than a grace.
I had just left the Harold Washington Library after having returned an overdue copy of Blowback: The Costs and Consequences of American Empire, which i had completed weeks ago, but subsequently loaned to my mom, with whom the book languished a bit before being perused interminably resulting in its belated return. It was 2:25. Too late to make the 2:30 train home and nearly an hour away from the 3:20. Usually my timing is better, but i lingered past a temporal threshold in the library trying in vain to evoke a title or topic that would spark an immediate interest, and i left earlier than i would have if i had been searching the shelves. I left empty handed and needed to waste some time.
I was drawn toward Walgreens by a faint desire, but could not, when it mattered most, remember that i needed pens and batteries. Again i left empty handed. With 40 minutes still left to waste, I could stop at Crow's Nest, but then i would have to face my own frustrating equivocation over musical choices. Instead i went into Garrett's and found a place in line behind a charmingly chatty mother and daughter. Patrons continued to fill in behind me as the line, constantly in motion but never changing shape, twisted its way through the tiny corner shop. There were two people working in the store at the time. When I reached the counter, the woman working the register had gone in the back to prepare more carmel popcorn. The other employee weighed and packaged my popcorn, but it was apparently not within his power to operate the cash register. He did the same for the woman behind me. Still, neither of us had paid. We waited. When he went in the back to get assistance, i turned to the woman behind me in line. "Let's make a run for it," i said. But she was not interested. And anyway the store was too crowded to make a speedy getaway. So i continued to await the return of the woman who possesed the mystical power to operate the cash register. That's okay. I had time to kill.

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Brain Candy

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I saw an interview a few weeks ago on the misguided mess that has become Chicago Tonight, with the psychologist who wrote The Myth of Laziness. If the book is right, it might explain some things about me. For example, it might explain why i haven't posted this week.

Here are some comments:

"Eulalia said this of your blog, 'Anthony's writing amuses me greatly."
-Troy

I assure you, if i amuse anyone besides myself, it is purely accidental.

"And she also stops by your page once a day and has been disappointed on the lack of new content."
-Troy

yes. well, i intend to plug my brain into it's portable generator over the weekend.
anyone else?

"I agree--that Duct Tape lobby is now just too powerful."
-Joel

It's not the most powerful lobby in Washington, but i still intend to start a "No Blood for Adhesives" campaign.

Ok. I don't know why there's that huge empty space in my previous post. I swear there's nothing betwixt the text and the table tags. I've also noticed that the page looks better generally with Netscape rather than IE, so if it doesn't look right, it's your fault.
Also, i had a commenting system up for a couple of hours last week, but it didn't work properly to begin with, and then it crashed the page. But, i may put the commenting system back to make the page unloadable if i feel the need to hide the fact that i don't have anything to say.

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Dr. Strangelove or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

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There was a woman on the Metra train whose cell phone, when it rang, played Mozart's Alla Turca with a surprisingly good sound quality; you could hear the thirds and everything. I wish she wouldn't have answered it so quickly. But then another cell phone conversation was starting behind me. (i remember when i thought it quite incongrous to see someone on public transportation with a cell phone, especially on the bus, but now the devices are ubiquitious: i've seen bus drivers on cell phones while driving, which is not at all an encouraging phenomenon.) I've always been intrigued by the way people will refer to the early stages of a courtship by saying: "i'm talking to him/her," as if they were engaged in high level negotiations. The young woman behind me on the train happened to be engaged in such a negotiation. She was, i would guess, about 16, and was articulating the requisite terms of any agreement. She explained why the agreement with her last negotiation partner had fallen through: "he was too sexual," and she stated unequivocally that she "needs a lot of attention."
I wanted to suggest to her, if boyfriends fail to meet her exacting demands, she might seek attention by starting a blog.

Here is the comment of the week:


"I think your niche has found you. Your brilliant wit is now being shared with the world, or at least a portion of it. Its great to see you speak to the world about the world and I'm sure no topic can escape your thoughts."
-MAC


Hey, thanx for the sycophantic flattery. There is much that eludes my understanding, but i will continue to type into this unholy abyss for the time being.

Well, this week saw a major victory for the Duct Tape lobby. (The Gaffer's tape people really dropped the ball on this one.) I'm going to go wrap myself in plastic, but before i do, i want to wish a happy valentine's day to all for whom that sort of thing is relevant.
I heard a radio commercial this week wherein a man wonders if he will have to leave the country after forgetting to get his significant other a Valentine's gift. "they don't deport you for that, do they?" he wonders. No my imaginary friend, but they can declare you an enemy combatant and detain you indefinitely.

Thanks for stopping by, Goodnight Amerika.

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Dutch

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There are two topics i was preparing for posts: One was a discussion of how the Bush economic plan looks a lot like Reagan-style supply-side economics and the potential effects of this kind of economic policy now vs. then, and last week was Reagan's birthday, and i found this Reagan quote, which isn't related to the economy, but which seems relevant to our times, and Two, the style and content of the documentary Power and Terror: Noam Chomsky In Our Times, which i saw Sunday at the Music Box, and that it isn't as good a film as Manufacturing Consent: Noam Chomsky And The Media, and that i have some concerns that the people who fill those lecture halls to see Noam are just Chomsky "cultists" who attend in their square framed glasses and blue oxford shirts to bob their heads in assention to what they already believe to be true. But after watching the film, and sketching some notes on the economy, i began to think that neither of these rather long-winded topics had much appeal to the blog reader's palate. Who looks to a blog to find some conjecture about the possibillity of the collapse of global consumer demand, i asked myself.
Have you ever placed a cd in a store where it didn't belong? Intentionally in order to communicate abstractly and anonymously with other customers? On my way back from Power and Terror i stopped at Borders on State St. and encountered a Jay-Z album misplaced among a rack of Charles Mingus cd's. This was not at all apropriate. I myself have on occasion placed an unsung artist of note in a more conspicuous place as if to say to passers by, "you should pay attention to this." While this in itself may be a pretentious activity i take the precaution of putting a favored artist with another who is not altogether dissimilar, thus subtlely informing the musical searching experience of the tabula rasa consumer. I would never so blatantly cross platforms, it's too jarring for most people. I'm sure it was a careless accident.

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War is a Force that Gives Us Meaning

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I happened to be reading an excerpt from Thomas Hobbes' Leviathan wherein he discusses Man's "state of nature" as a war of all against all. Except in that wonderful Olde English spelling it's not war but Warre, which sounds far more serious than a simple war. A Warre sounds like a truly horrible and destructive event, so it's a good thing we no longer use that spelling.


I'm actually looking forward to the war with Iraq. It's an exciting state of affairs. I'm almost ready to cheer on the destruction to be wrought by precision guided munitions and Tom Cruise missles. It seems like the thing to do: Hey we're going to war, let's party! Just look at all those cool weapons!
It's a conditioned response as reliable as a salivating dog's. Donald Rumsfeld will stand before the podium making macho quips while showing a grainy black and white video of something blowing up. But, I suppose some considerations will forestall my indulging in this Pavlovian glee.

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Bandwagonesque

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As I promised i'm posting the comments received during the week. But first, let me tell you about some of the improvements hopefully to come at alpha charlie bravo to make your blog experience better:

• An actual commenting system so viewers can respond to the blog instantaneously


• Links to other blogs


• meta tags


• At least 4 new posts every week, Mon-Thurs.


• NU beat Indiana!


• More non-sequitors

These are just some of the improvements to come. If you have any suggestions on how alpha charlie bravo can improve, email me. Also, feel free to link alpha charlie bravo on your blog or site and I will link yours. Just send me the URL, if i don't already have it, and up you go.
Here are the comments of the week:



Re: I Am Music:



"I love Yankee Hotel Foxtrot!"

-Donna



I had admired Wilco for some time before Yankee Hotel but, i never made the commitment, until. It's #1 on Amazon.com's editor's choice list. Flaming Lips and Neko Case are also on the list.



Re: The Birth of Tragedy:



"...when the Challenger crashed... it put it in perspective for everyone that, oh, wait, this is dangerous. This time around, we understand it better, I think. And hey, maybe, just maybe, the World Trade Center tragedy truthfully redefined the word "tragedy" for the common person...of course, not my colleagues in the media...ridiculous."

-Andy



I think that's exactly right. Maybe we haven't always apreciated how dangerous going into space is to begin with. In fact, i'm damn impressed that in over twenty years of shuttle flights, NASA has only had two fatal accidents. Space travel isn't like Airline travel, there are exponentially greater risks and challenging those risks is heroic in itself. The 7 astronauts don't become heroes because they died, all Death makes of us is dust. If they are heroes, it must be for the way they lived, and aspired to live.



Well, that's the end of our broadcast week. Thanks for stopping by and don't forget to tune in Monday. Hopefully I'll be able to think up some crap by then.

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Helter Skelter

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Has anyone yet made a definitive judgement on "Jimmy Kimmel Live?" I've really only seen a few seconds of it here and there, but not one of those seconds was funny. Although maybe it's just that i haven't acclimated myself to the program's structure and style. ...Or maybe it's just bad.

I always thought that Charles Manson should have his own late night talk show. You would have a set with couches and a backdrop, but instead of a desk you would have a large t.v. monitor on which Manson would appear "live via satelite" from the California State Prison. He would probably need a sidekick; and a Beatles cover band for his house band. Of course his monologue would be gibberish, but if with most of his guests he could behave in a manner generally appropriate for a talk show host and say, "let's watch the clip," and "my guest will be appearing at the Comedy Castle," this would make his insane rants that much more entertaining. Of course it would follow Nightline. Can't you hear Ted Koppel saying, "Thanks for joining us. Now stay tuned for Charles Manson Live."

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The Soft Bulletin

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Of course, the marketing is better than the product.

The blog debuts today, but there are posts going back about a week. Feel free to comment, respond, criticize any and all via the email link at the end of each post. I'll post some of the email comments so we can have a nice feedback loop.
Blog on!

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The Birth of Tragedy

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Peter Jennings, at least, on Saturday remarked how the space shuttle Colombia accident was a national tragedy, but I personally don't feel all that tragically impacted. (Nor do i feel nationally tragic. Locally, perhaps...) Then P.J. said stay with ABC news, "this is a tragedy which we will continue to be associated with." Well, i've always associated Disney with tragedy, but still it's nice to see ABC make such an effort to align its identity with a tragic event.
Also, CNN on their "Breaking News" rotating graphic (above the crawl, below the feed picture), gave us two indispensible pieces of information. They were:

"UNITED SPACE ALLIANCE SAYS, 'WE DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED"

yes, now that i know that you don't know, i know i will feel a lot better, you know?

and
"WALTER CRONKITE SAYS, 'WE ARE COMMITTED TO SPACE"

Who the hell called up Walter Cronkite, woke him from his nap and asked him for a quote? How is that supposed to contribute to my understanding of this event? If CNN hadn't already told me that the United Space Alliance said "We don't know what happened," i would be completely in the dark.