Journey's End

I once tried to share my geek-filled passion for Doctor Who with someone who took no interest in my obvious attempt at indoctrination. The question was posed to me, "Why do you watch this show?" I replied that my interest in the show was "tied-up with my psychopathology," but I never provided an explication of this answer.

Steven Moffat, the excellent writer who is taking over as executive producer of Doctor Who for Series 5, said in a recent interview that the audience doesn't identify with the title character. The Doctor, Moffat said, is too strange, too alien for the audience to relate to. They relate, he insists, to the human companion who briefly forsakes ordinary life to have adventures in time and space. Not me. I have always, since I was a child, identified directly with The Doctor. He is the hero I wanted to be in my childhood fantasies. The Doctor saves the world, protects his friends and has fun doing it.

But it is more than that. The Doctor is more like me (or perhaps, more like the person I wanted to be) than any person I had encountered in life. He is different and eccentric to the point of being strange. He has difficulty relating to the behavior and attitudes of his human companions. His intelligence is his best and often, his only weapon. He endeavors to do always what is right, even though he sometimes gets it wrong. He is also flawed. The First Doctor was cantankerous, the Second impatient, the Third pompous, the Fourth aloof, the Fifth petulant, the Sixth had a temper, and the Seventh was conniving.

The New Series has revealed even greater complexities in the character. We already expected that he would always reject the notion of an ordinary life. He will never marry, or have a family, or live in a house; The Doctor will always keep traveling. But we discover now that The Doctor travels not just for the fun and adventure, but because he can't face his own past; he is always running away from himself.

The Doctor's interminable journey must be undertaken alone. Although, a friend may come along for part of the ride, ultimately he will end up on his own. This is illustrated best, if somewhat heavy handedly, by the final scene of the Series 4 finale "Journey's End." The Doctor's friends assemble to help him save the universe. They succeed, of course, and The Doctor takes them home so that they can all resume their normal lives. Again, he is left on his own. As he is about to depart he is asked, "What about you? Who have you got? What about all those friends of yours?" The Doctor pauses amid a clichéd downpour of rain to answer, "They've all got someone else."

He is strange, yet wonderful; loved, and yet alone. And The Doctor, being who he is, has, since I first discovered him as a child, made it alright for me to be who I am. Now, if only I could save the world...